Via Napoli Bathroom Review: So… Is This Bathroom Good or Bad?#83

I love eating at Via Napoli.

The pizza is amazing.

I have many, many thoughts about that pizza.

But this is not the place for those thoughts.

Hold it together, Maggie.

This is a bathroom review.

And this bathroom has me completely confused.

Because I visited it twice.

On the same day.

And somehow…

I visited two entirely different bathrooms.

At least that is what it felt like.

Visit #1: Bathroom Bliss

We had an 11:30 lunch reservation, so we were at Via Napoli right when it opened.

Naturally, I went to investigate the bathroom.

And it was magnificent.

Empty.

Clean.

Cold.

Peaceful.

Italian music was playing.

I could wander around and quietly judge all the strange little design choices without another human being in my way.

This was my kind of bathroom experience.

I looked at the interesting tile.

I studied the sinks.

I stared at the rather unexpected lady-shaped decoration.

More on her in a minute.

I left thinking:

Wow. This is a GREAT bathroom.

And then I practically skipped back to our table.

Bathroom happiness achieved.

And Then I Drank Four Glasses of Water

Via Napoli has delicious water.

Yes, I realize that sounds ridiculous.

But I drank four glasses.

Four.

You can probably figure out what happened next.

Back to the bathroom I went.

Except…

WHAT HAPPENED TO MY BEAUTIFUL BATHROOM?!

The peaceful little Italian bathroom from earlier had disappeared.

The line for the women's room was out the door.

It was crowded.

It was dirty.

Two paper towel dispensers were empty.

The lovely Italian music was either gone or the bathroom was so loud I couldn't hear it anymore.

And somehow the bathroom that had been wonderfully cold earlier was now hot and stuffy.

Moms were yelling.

Children were crying.

People were everywhere.

My peaceful Italian bathroom vacation had become a bathroom emergency summit.

I wanted out.

Immediately.

The Details

Location: Inside Via Napoli at EPCOT's Italy Pavilion

Nearest Landmark: All the way in the back of the restaurant, on the left-hand side

Best Time: RIGHT WHEN VIA NAPOLI OPENS. I cannot emphasize this enough.

Crowd Level: Apparently either completely empty or DEFCON Bathroom.

Anything Special: Two companion bathrooms! Yes. TWO.

And I have to give Via Napoli credit for something else.

The restaurant is huge, and it would be very easy to get turned around looking for the bathroom.

Thankfully, there are plenty of signs pointing you in the correct direction.

The Cast Members also did a great job explaining exactly where the bathrooms were.

Just keep heading toward the back and look to the left.

You will eventually find them.

Hopefully before the four glasses of water come calling.

The Official Ruling

Situation: This depends entirely on what time you visit. At opening? Wonderful. During the lunch rush? Run for your life.

Cold Air: Glorious at 11:30. Missing in action later.

Stall Situation: Plenty of regular stalls, including accessible stalls.

Paper Situation: Fine during my first visit. By my second visit, two paper towel dispensers had surrendered.

Flush Situation: Nothing particularly memorable, which is sometimes exactly what I want from a toilet.

Noise Level: Peaceful Italian music at opening. Absolute bathroom chaos during lunch.

Smell: Fine during my first visit. The second visit had enough happening that my nose was no longer my primary concern.

Handwashing Area: I have questions about the green tile and blue sinks. I would not have chosen this combination, but somehow it does feel very Italian.

Decor: This is where things get interesting.

I love the back wall.

The tile isn't simply flat against the wall. It sticks out and creates almost a 3-D sculpture effect.

It's unusual.

It's interesting.

I kept staring at it.

And then there is…

the lady.

There is a body-shaped female figure in the women's bathroom, and I was NOT prepared for her.

She scared me at first.

I turned around and basically had a tiny WHO IS THAT? moment.

There is apparently a male version in the men's room.

I know this because Dave saw him.

Do I have photographic evidence?

No.

Because Dave refused to take a picture.

Apparently there are limits to how far he is willing to participate in The Great Disney Bathroom Quest.

Companion Restroom: TWO!

This deserves another celebration.

TWO COMPANION BATHROOMS!

I was so happy to see this, especially since there are also accessible stalls inside the regular restrooms.

Overall Comfort: At opening, excellent. During lunch, stressful, hot and overwhelming.

Final Verdict

I don't know what to do with this bathroom.

Is it a good bathroom that had a bad moment?

Or a bad bathroom that happened to have one glorious moment?

Because Bathroom #1 was wonderful.

Cold air.

Italian music.

Clean stalls.

No crowds.

Interesting decor.

Two companion bathrooms.

I would happily use that bathroom again.

Bathroom #2?

No thank you.

Bathroom #2 can keep its line out the door, empty paper towel dispensers, crying children, yelling parents and hot stuffy air.

And here's the strangest part:

They were the exact same bathroom.

So my official Via Napoli bathroom ruling comes with a giant asterisk:

GO EARLY.

If you are eating right when Via Napoli opens, congratulations.

You may have found yourself a lovely little bathroom in Italy.

If you are there during the middle of the lunch rush?

Finish your pizza.

Maybe reconsider that fourth glass of water.

And prepare yourself.